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    Entertain me!

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    tuck
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    Entertain me!

    Post by tuck on 22/01/13, 03:09 pm

    Kallista hung over the railing of the ship like a wet towel, completely limp. Her arms and head dangled over the side listlessly. She'd been like that for nearly ten minutes now, and the blood rushing to her head was beginning to give her a migraine.

    "Boooooooooooooooored!" she moaned with a frustrated sigh as she pulled herself upright. She was momentarily dizzy as her circulation returned to normal.

    "We've been stuck on this boat for over a day without going anywhere. We can't even get off..." she said to no one in particular, "Someone entertain me before things start getting set on fire."
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    Re: Entertain me!

    Post by Curtana on 22/01/13, 04:07 pm

    Alia leaned back in the chair she'd dragged out onto the deck. "Brenn told me no knife-throwing contests on the Highwind. Something about damaging the woodwork and blah blah blah. Besides, if we threw one off the ship entirely, we couldn't even go get it. This sucks."
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    Re: Entertain me!

    Post by elanya on 22/01/13, 05:06 pm

    "Fuck, man," Tzesira grumbled, "If we list all the otherwise fun shit we can't do onboard anymore, we'd probably kill enough time that they'd let us off, but we'd all be fucking dead of fucking boredom by then. This is such shit! We helped them!"
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    Re: Entertain me!

    Post by tuck on 22/01/13, 05:51 pm

    "Tell me about it," Kallista sighed, sliding down to a sitting position against the ship railing.

    "There's gotta be something we can do."
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    Re: Entertain me!

    Post by Curtana on 22/01/13, 05:53 pm

    "Tell me a story," Alia said brightly. "Tell me about... your first kiss. Those are usually good for a laugh."
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    Re: Entertain me!

    Post by elanya on 22/01/13, 06:03 pm

    Tzesira gave Alia an odd look. "Really? People pay attention to that shit? What a weird thing to crow about. I mean, fucks, maybe they're worth crowing, but kisses? Lame."
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    Re: Entertain me!

    Post by Curtana on 23/01/13, 02:45 pm

    "Didn't say you had to crow about it," Alia retorted. "I mean, mine's sure not worth bragging about. Then again, neither was my first fuck, but that's not the point. The point is, I want people to tell me about their awkward and embarrassing personal lives for my own amusement."
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    Re: Entertain me!

    Post by tuck on 23/01/13, 03:05 pm

    "A cleric..." Kallista said, leaning back against the railing, "...for both. A few weeks out of Bael Hexott he saved me from some will-o-wisps on the road. We traveled together for a while."

    She suddenly found that she was intensely interested in the dirt under her fingernails.

    "He... he's the first one I count."
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    Re: Entertain me!

    Post by elanya on 23/01/13, 05:36 pm

    Tzesira turned from giving Alia a weird look - why would she want to tell awkward stories? - and grinned at Kallista. "Well? Was he any good? Did this cleric have a name?"
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    Re: Entertain me!

    Post by tuck on 23/01/13, 05:42 pm

    "He was... inexperienced. But he was a good man. A very good man. He deserved better than what I could give him at the time."

    Kallista tried not to show any emotion in her voice, but her eyes never rose to meet Tzesira's.

    "His name was Damun. I never caught his last name."
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    Re: Entertain me!

    Post by Curtana on 23/01/13, 07:20 pm

    "Aww," Alia said, smiling a little more sincerely. "That sounds sweet, Kay. Not even remotely chuckle-worthy, but sweet. What happened?" She looked a little worried. "Is it sad? I don't know if I'm up for 'sad' right now. But ... hell, whatever, if you wanna spill, you can, or else you can tell me to fuck off. Either way."
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    Re: Entertain me!

    Post by tuck on 23/01/13, 08:16 pm

    Kallista shrugged.

    "There's not much more to tell, really. We only spent about two days together. I haven't seen him since. That was a long time ago."

    She looked up at Alia.

    "How about you? Who was your first?"
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    Re: Entertain me!

    Post by Curtana on 23/01/13, 10:19 pm

    Alia stretched lazily. "Okay, but I did warn you it was nothing to brag about. He was some kind of... junior assistant gardener, and as far as I could tell his main job was shoveling stuff. He had nice arms," she said, smiling in fond reminiscence, "but he was pretty dim. That's okay, though, I wasn't interested in his conversation. Anyway, I got him alone in the loft above the stable one day and things were going pretty well, I thought - not that I had anything to compare it to at the time - until the head gardener showed up looking for him. He was afraid he was going to get in shit, which was probably fair, but he didn't want to stop either. So he shoved me under a pile of hay until he finished telling his boss he'd be right down or whatever stupid lie he made up. Very romantic. And it was prickly and it got everywhere ," she said with a dramatic shudder. "So I smacked him when he finally pulled me out and then I tried to make a dramatic exit except I slipped going down the ladder and sprained my ankle, and so he ended up having to carry me back to the house anyway. And he took the opportunity to get a good grope in while he was at it. Bleh. My first time with a girl was much nicer," she added with a smirk.
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    Re: Entertain me!

    Post by elanya on 24/01/13, 11:17 pm

    Tzesira smirked in mild amusement at Alia's tale, though she still wasn't sure she understood the point of telling that kind of story. "See, now *that* sounds like it would be worth fuckin' hearing about!"
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    Re: Entertain me!

    Post by Curtana on 25/01/13, 02:31 pm

    "Yeah, but come on," Alia protested, "Kay and I both told a story and you haven't yet, that's hardly fair! Pull your weight, bitch."
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    Re: Entertain me!

    Post by tuck on 25/01/13, 03:49 pm

    "Yeah", kallista said with a grin, "Suck it up, bitch."
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    Re: Entertain me!

    Post by elanya on 25/01/13, 04:07 pm

    "Well, I'm not telling any lame stories about shit I don't remember anyway," she started, puffing up her chest a bit. "But I remember the first guy I fucked that was worth remembering." She grinned, flashing her teeth. "Name was Szvaris. Didn't think I could beat him in a fight. I bet him I could - he lost. He was pretty pissed about it, to, so he gave it to me pretty hard. It was fuckin' awesome."
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    Re: Entertain me!

    Post by tuck on 25/01/13, 04:20 pm

    "That... explains a lot." Kallista said, nodding slowly, "Whatever happened to him?"
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    Re: Entertain me!

    Post by elanya on 25/01/13, 04:25 pm

    Tzesira shrugged. "I don't know. He probably died."
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    Re: Entertain me!

    Post by Curtana on 25/01/13, 05:44 pm

    "Uh... that's cool?" Alia said, blinking in surprise. "The fucking sounds like it was good, at least. Less so the 'probably dying' part - well, less good for him."
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    Re: Entertain me!

    Post by elanya on 25/01/13, 05:49 pm

    "Enh, it happens." She shrugged again, then eyed the other girls. "The dying part is not related to the fucking."
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    Re: Entertain me!

    Post by tuck on 25/01/13, 08:47 pm

    "I would hope not," Kallista said, raising an eyebrow, "If it was, I'd feel a lot less comfortable sharing a bed with you. No sex is worth dying for."

    She winked at the Shadar-kai.

    "Not even with you."
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    Re: Entertain me!

    Post by elanya on 25/01/13, 09:57 pm

    Tzesira grinned again. "Well, they don't call it 'the little death' for nothing..."
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    Re: Entertain me!

    Post by Curtana on 26/01/13, 04:27 pm

    "Yeah, well, people call it all sorts of ridiculous things," Alia said brightly. "Buttering the bun, milking the weasel, doing the horizontal hornpipe... I don't think we're supposed to take those literally, though."
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    Re: Entertain me!

    Post by tuck on 26/01/13, 05:05 pm

    "Grappling the tentacle monster, looting the body, sheathing the magic sword, making a grapple check, slaying the cyclops, stuffing the bag of holding, playing hide the halfling... although Monti says I shouldn't use that one 'cause it's racist... checking for traps, clearing the dungeon, polishing the rod of wonder. I know like a million of these. Most adventurers aren't very subtle people."

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