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    Fuck you, and you, and you - you're okay - and fuck you too, I'm out.

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    elanya
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    Fuck you, and you, and you - you're okay - and fuck you too, I'm out.

    Post by elanya on 15/04/12, 11:04 pm

    She knew she should be happy for the team, but anger and disappointment at herself were building inside her to drown everything else out. All day she'd been poor company, snapping at the interviewer who'd made the poor choice of asking her what she'd felt when the Arena's revived her and she'd learned the Thunderbolts had won. She felt pissed, is what she'd felt, that she'd barely been part of it. She was too upset to *rationally* analyze her performance, either, but everyone else's good cheer just wound its way under her skin. The whoel thing had been her idea! Well - the seed of it, anyway. Bu no - not a single ass had been kicked by Tzesira Rhob. She got in a few good licks, but not enough. Nothing to distinguish her performance. Just a road bump for the enemy strikers.

    It hurt her pride bad enough without learning that Hanrak had been there - she felt really ashamed of her performance in front of him. Having to try and put on a good face for their new adoring fans (fans she hadn't earned) when she mostly wanted to scream and hit things wasn't helping. It wasn't helping her, and really, it was probably not helping the rest of her team either. Then fine. She'd meant to get away for a while anyway. There was no time like the present, and maybe by the time she returned she'd feel like she deserved to show her face with the rest of the team.

    Well, fuck this place then, she though, tossing aside her glass. She'd intended to leave straight away, to return to the barracks, collect her things, and be done with it. She turned on her heel to make for the entrance, and stopped.

    No, fuck that too - she didn't want to be that much of an asshole. She scanned the room, picking out the rose of Kallista's skin from the (ridiculously impractical) backless dress that Brenn had bought for her. She was dancing with the Elomeni airship captain of course, but with her patience already worn thin, she didn't care how rude it was to interrupt.

    With a steely look at Brenn, a warning to back off, she marched up to the pair and crossed her arms over her clenched fists.

    "Kay. I'm going home."

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    tuck
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    Post by tuck on 15/04/12, 11:26 pm

    Even without the blazing lanterns that dotted the ballroom, Kallista's smile would have been more than enough to light it. She was as happy as she could remember being since... well, since ever. The dancing lessons with Dheni had mostly paid off and she was managing to keep up with Brenn as the two of them twirled around the floor, hanging off of each other and giggling like children. They were one of the handsomest couples in the room, and even Kallista's mediocre dancing skills didn't stop them from drawing the eye of many of the celebrants. Kallista was loving every second of it.

    Suddenly, from the corner of her eye, Kallista saw her best friend approaching, and she could almost see the dark storm cloud hanging over the shadar kai's head. When Tzesira gave her simple statement, Kallista put one hand on Brenn's arm.

    "Give me a sec." She said to the airship captain, who simply nodded and smiled.

    Kallista put her silk-gloved hand on Tzesira's shoulder and turned away from the main dance floor, a look of concern on her face.

    "Is everything okay?" she asked.
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    elanya
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    Post by elanya on 15/04/12, 11:28 pm

    She let herself be drawn away, her scowl fixed to her face. "Fuck - no, nothing is fucking okay. I sucked ass today, and everyone was watching, and its pissing me off, and I'm fucking going home."
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    Re: Fuck you, and you, and you - you're okay - and fuck you too, I'm out.

    Post by tuck on 15/04/12, 11:35 pm

    "Oh, sweetheart..." Kallista said, sympathetically, "You did great today! We all did! We're melee strikers. We take damage. Sometimes we go down early. It happened to me in our second level test, remember? I was beating myself up for days about it."

    She bit her lip slightly, not sure if she was really helping the situation. She had been Tzesira's friend long enough now to know that sometimes the woman just needed time alone, and there was nothing anyone could do, but it was against every fiber of her being to not at least try.

    "We're a team. We win or lose as a team. This victory is just as much yours as any of ours."
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    elanya
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    Post by elanya on 15/04/12, 11:43 pm

    Her brow furrowed even further. "I know. I'm being a fucking cunt and I need to get fucking away."
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    tuck
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    Post by tuck on 15/04/12, 11:47 pm

    Kallista sighed.

    "That's not what I'm saying..." she muttered.

    She turned and looked back at Brenn, who was carousing with one or another of the many nobles hanging around him. She turned back to her friend and for a moment she was ashamed of how hard it was for her to ask her next question.

    "Do you want me to go with you?"
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    elanya
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    Re: Fuck you, and you, and you - you're okay - and fuck you too, I'm out.

    Post by elanya on 16/04/12, 12:00 am

    Tzesira stared blankly at her friend for a moment before she realized that Kallista hadn't really understood what she'd meant by 'home'. And maybe that was okay for now - she could leave her a note, and explain things better. She barked a bitter laugh. "Fuck, no. Go have fun, Kay. *You* fucking earned it." Standing up on the balls of her feet, she reached to give the taller woman a quick kiss before turning to leave.
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    Re: Fuck you, and you, and you - you're okay - and fuck you too, I'm out.

    Post by tuck on 16/04/12, 12:09 am

    Kallista was caught off guard by her friend's uncharacteristically sweet gesture. As she turned to leave, though, Kallista put one hand on her arm to stop her.

    "Hey..." she said, ignoring the glare in Tzesira's eyes when she turned around, "Stay safe."

    With that she took her hand away. There was nothing she could do but let her go, however much it pained her. She watched her friend walk away sullenly and sighed. She knew it was for the best, but that didn't make it any easier.

    She turned back to the party and found her date refilling his glass at the wine bar.

    "Everything okay?" he asked when she came up beside him.

    She reached up with one gloved hand and pulled his face to her, kissing him passionately, not caring who saw.

    When she pulled away she smiled.

    "Shut up and let's dance", she said.

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